


a good boy

by paceslikeaghost8



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: 18+, Alternate Universe, Angst, Blowjobs, Creampie, Degradation, Dom/sub, Dominant Eren Yeager, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Implied Smut, Lactation, Lactation Kink, Lotsa cum, Minors don't read, Mommy Issues, Mommy Kink, Nipple Play, Older Eren Yeager, Period-Typical Sexism, Smut, Soft Eren Yeager, Switch Eren, aot chapter 1 spoilers, based in 1800s, dom eren, ereh is clingy, eren gets dreams from founder titan but he has no titan here, eren slutshames u in bed basically but he don't mean it, flashbacks of sexual endeavors, marriage AU, married sex lmao, not modern au but not canon either, slightly possessive but lets you have freedom, still women empowerment even in that era, sub eren
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-12
Updated: 2021-03-18
Packaged: 2021-03-20 07:01:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30001092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paceslikeaghost8/pseuds/paceslikeaghost8
Summary: Your husband clings to you as much as your child does. Eren aches to love you, salvage you and make you his own. Especially at night, you give him the utmost comfort, love and pleasure.
Relationships: Eren Yeager/Reader
Comments: 16
Kudos: 122





	1. Chapter 1

You don’t know what it is about your husband, but it brought you an imprisoned speck of worry that you can’t understand. Eren worked at Levi’s restaurant as a waiter and did extra studying for his father’s research. You were just another kid from a noble family, moved to the city to get a degree. Now you have a degree, even a job at the university in your town and your husband waiting at home. He has taken time off since your maternity leave ended, in this society it is unusual for a woman to work but the numbers have been rising. Even though your neighbours send your husband strange looks when he carries your nine month old on his way to buy necessities. But he doesn’t care, he never has and never will. All that matters to him is you. Your ease. It’s his child you carried once, the least he can do is look after it. The baby resembles way too much like him, his hair and his eyes. He might have your face shape and nose but your son resembles his father more. 

Outside your door, he stands and listens to you humming and pacing. He opens the door finally, to be welcomed with a kiss on his cheek and two kisses on his son’s forehead. Eren grumbles to himself, wondering what he did wrong to not get another peck but he didn’t voice his thoughts. Of course a mother loves her child more, a father should as well.   
“I’m recooking your chicken from last night. Since you work so hard all day, I didn’t want you to take further responsibility.” you mutter.  
“Thanks, mo-...” he says but stops in his tracks as he puts the infant on his chair. “When did you get home?” You turned to see his face, eyes suddenly lost in despair.  
“30 minutes ago, actually.” you respond. Eren’s eyes are strange. Not the color or the appearance, moreso the vacuum that stays every now and then. The fiery rage turns cold, the passion runs off followed by aggressive neediness. This happens way too often. 

Within the next two hours, dinner ends. You both clean up the kitchen together, the bulb in the centre reflects off the shiny plates. The son you both share whines a little, your footsteps instinctively running to hold him. Shush him to peace and serenity, melting at a baby’s grubby hands. Eren hated when he didn’t receive the same affection from you at the same time. He shakes his head, knowing you’ll give it to him and his insolent dreams had no courage to intervene in his reality. The fireplace is lit up, your husband makes you some tea and you excitedly tell him about some of your students.   
“I hate laughing at dumb answers people leave in exams but I’ve been there myself.” you say. “Sometimes they pay no attention at all, but you see they try. And I feel so bad about not rewarding them with points.”  
“If it’s not correct, what else will you do?” he tries reassuring you. “You’re a teacher at the end of the day, you have to show them where they went wrong.” 

It was always warm with him, even when the world inside his head fell apart. You thought of the countless times he attached himself to you even before marriage. He had a mother who loved him but after he met you, he realized that he never left the headspace of being the epitome of a family’s construction. Eren admired you, married you and agreed to have a child with you. But he never wanted to be jealous of the child. No, you weren’t his mother. But his dreams would be so overzealous, such stupidity. About losing his mom, her being eaten by a giant. It sounded obscure when he said it out loud, but he had nobody all this time. Now he has you but he’s afraid he’ll lose you. Because the warmth he received in that dream was the same as his mother in real life, and you. Strangely you. It was odd, he wanted to love you but he also wanted to fuck you. You were his, nobody else’s. Not even his child loved you as much as Eren did. 

While in bed, he’d think of his dreams again. Often shoving his face in between your breasts for comfort, being lulled by your heartbeat. His soft locks would be in between your fingers as you whisper sweet words to comfort him. To just close his eyes. But eren would whine, he is so stubborn that he wouldn’t stop until you unbuttoned your nightshirt. In the darkness, he could still memorize where your tits are and he will sigh in content at the sight of them. You’d nod, tell him to go ahead like he’s your baby. His lips would kiss around areola, then the tip of your soft peaks and finally, he’d take it into his mouth. Cradling the back of his neck, you would coo at his eager nursing. He genuinely loves your milk, your cum and even your sweat. At these moments, he’d gently suckle and smile when you kiss his forehead. Eren loves you so much and he loves being told that you love him back. 

Your son would be in his cot, asleep far from your bed but in the same room. He didn’t wake up often but your son was almost as clingy as your husband. Addicted to your warmth, smell and love. It’s okay when he’s asleep, because Eren’s long fingers would travel up your thighs and softly cup your pussy. You would whine but your whines were all muffled by the soft kisses he’d leave on your lips. Often you’d hear him say, “thank you, mommy.” “does mommy love my big dick?” “I am a good boy, aren’t I? Pleasing you and making you feel things you can’t feel alone.” When he prepped you enough, he’d release his rock-hard cock and he would expect you to spread your legs and take his painful length. But you want your husband’s sweet cock to get some relief as well, bringing it to your lips and kissing the base while pressing the tip. Your favourite sound is hearing him moan like the whore he is for you, and calling you ‘mommy’. He’d come on your lips before you could take the entire thing in your mouth just because he imagined you squeezing his cum in your throat. Eren and you stare at each other, smiling in silence now. Getting to bed should take a while and you have your own fantasies clouding your minds. He didn’t know what was worse, the child whining in the middle of the night or you overstimming him when you bounced on his cock right after he came. He loved seeing his white cream on your chin and bottom lip, he just wanted to mess your clean body up. A loving husband. A caring husband.

It was a different case every night and as you both drink tea, his tent is visible through his trousers and that led you to your thoughts. Sometimes when you wash dishes or check copies, crossing off things with your quill, he will come from the back and knead your soft breasts. Light feathery touches and slow kneading is usually all it takes for you to crumble at his contact. The baby is asleep and you both are trying to turn the thoughts you are having into reality. Your back is relaxed on the couch as your husband bends his neck down to meet your bare chest, full from the last time it deflated when you fed your baby. Eren touches them, one at a time, then both tits at once. The rough pads of his thumb nimbly strokes your soft nipples. Eren licks at your left nipple, surprising you with a nice suck. He looks at some milk dripping, opting to make eye contact with you. 

Then, he whispers into your ear. “I’ve been a good boy all day, mommy. If you give me a treat, I’ll fill you with my seed.”


	2. passion like no other

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The domesticity might have hurt other men's masculinity, but submitting his compassion to you is Eren's first priority.

Last night was tiring but you both were thankful that it is a weekend today. Your husband isn’t lying beside you and you have assumed that he is currently making breakfast for you in the kitchen. Eren named his child Armin Jaeger, saying he dreamt of having a close friend called Armin. You always thought that his dreams were random and Eren often demonstrates the immense details that he has zero explanations for. All he knows is that his dreams are not a part of this current physical existence and you go along with whatever he says. 

Simply put, you only teach five days a week at your university. Your job is to take three lectures per day, leaving home at 8 and returning at 4. During these eight hours, your benevolent partner will prepare the substitute for your breast milk, grains with vegetables and some chicken for Armin. Eren will wash the dishes from the morning and wash clothes by hand. Your house came with an open balcony, much like Eren’s home in his multidimensional splashes of thoughts. A home he might have had somewhere. But your family’s money made it much more luxurious and he couldn’t have been happier that your parents offered to let him live in leisure. What he dislikes is that it is too big for a family of three, too much to clean and too empty. Dusting the furniture, making the bed, organizing your child’s toys. Your father insists on visiting Eren at least a few times a week, often bringing food cooked by your grandmother. 

He enjoys staying at home although Eren misses working at his father’s office, studying more about his research and contributing to it. But he also loves making your parents their preferred style of tea, decorating cookies to go along with it and constantly telling them to stay for lunch to thank them for everything they have done for him. He’s not focusing on the house, he’s thankful that they thought of bringing you, his cherished woman to this world. If you never studied at the university and got married off like most of the noble daughters, he wouldn’t have met you. Whatever he’s sacrificing in his life until your baby is older, putting aside his job to look after Armin, is for your benefit. Your comfort. 

Even on off-days, he prefers that you coddle Armin and pepper him with kisses in the morning. Pat his messy hair and blow raspberries on his stomach to elicit some giggles. Although Armin takes away the attention you would give your husband, Eren has grown a soft spot for him. You wait for breakfast and Armin pats at the maroon patch on your neck, one you haven’t noticed. Armin is such a smart baby, trying to say Mama with concern in his teal eyes. You carry him to the mirror to take a look at it yourself then you remember; you can’t go to work with one of the many marks Eren has left all open. Both sides of your neck adorn his possession and you know he has done it on purpose last night.

He has given you what he promised; he doesn’t dare to come inside unless your period is near but you were so full of his cream. You remember how he snickered when his palm pressed on the bottom of your belly with thick spurts of his own seed oozing. You couldn’t comprehend anything, the very many things your husband gives you just because you feed him your milk. But you don’t know that to Eren, you’re letting him rewatch the motherhood his own parents shared. He doesn’t remember because he was the baby, but he’s stuck in the headspace of being your husband and being loved like a child. “I see why I made you a mommy, deep down inside I know where you belong. To a brothel. If i only knew you were such a slut for dicks, for my length... But it’s okay mommy, you know I love you. I can not let anyone see you or love you like I do.” These words made you cum for the fourth time that night, not fearing how it also made Eren shoot his second load. Eren is also forgetting that if he keeps up, he might as well have a new competition. 

You know how loud you were last night. Almost every time you both made noises, your neighbours would send you looks the morning after. You would go to work and Pieck Kirstein from next door would smile politely, asking you if another one is on the way. She’s the only person you’d appreciate this comment from as you both bonded over carrying children at the same time. Your other neighbour Connie Springer would whistle at Eren when he goes outside to walk with his child clinging to him. Two friends named Ymir and Historia live right across from your house and you doubted that they are just friends. Ymir, the taller one, told you to keep it down in front of all the neighbours once. But how could you? Eren loves you so much. Eren hates being told the same. He loves you and if everyone knows it, then be it! You’re the one earning the money, he’s the one bathing the child and feeding it. You’re the one who wakes up and breastfeeds Armin, as your husband waits for you to sit on his lap. He’s the one who finishes the leftover milk from your teat, cleaning it before you dress up for work. People don’t know, so they just talk. Now, Eren calls you out for eggs and toast and both of you finally have a proper meal, not your milk or his cum. Actual food.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!! I'm so thankful for those requesting for another chapter and those sending kudos. your messages and love means a lot to me. I named the child Armin because I really miss EMA but since they aren't existing in this universe, i guess the least i can do is give this baby one of their names. lmk if you want a third chapter.


	3. interrupted tranquility

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another day in Eren's life of taking care of you and your son, but another day of emotional turmoil.
> 
> (SEASON 4 ep 8 AND MANGA SPOILERS)

One fine Friday morning, Eren locks the door with his child in one arm and a basket in another. He’s finally wearing a shirt without criss-crossed tassels on the collar. Another day the househusband walks around, probably after banging his rich bride. Another guy who married for money. Or worse, a man who doesn’t patronize his wife. He hated everyone’s judgements and their misinterpreted fantasies on what Eren does. Dr. Jaeger’s son should have helped his father but do they forget that Eren is a father on his own? Armin looked at him with big teal eyes, trying to pull his long hair. Something Eren did with his own mother when he was little. 

Connie sells tea leaves at his family’s stall, their business has been booming for years. Eren has also known Connie for a long time and sometimes gets one or two bags for free. You lived on tea and on special days you’d drink coffee. Eren fished his wallet with one hand, trying to find the leftover money to buy some tea leaves. He has bought eggs, flour, cheese, tomatoes and shrimp from the local market already. Feeling unequivocally loved from the night before, he needed a few things to cook you a special meal.   
“So… how’s married life?” Connie asks with a smirk.  
“It’s great, the child is the hardest part though.” Eren responds.   
“When will you go back to work?” Connie says.  
“When Armin will be fine without mama or dada around, hmm, baby?” Eren glances at his distracted boy. “Hopefully not soon, I enjoy not doing anything for the moment.”

He bids Connie goodbye, promising Connie to meet him someday for a drink. Except Eren doesn’t drink alcohol anymore, not since you had the baby. You don’t have work today, you spent the morning lazing around your couch in the living room and humming to a song you heard on the street the other day. Your mother insisted on buying Eren and you a gramophone. They even offered to give you a carriage with a horse and a coachman. Both you and Eren politely decline most of the time. 

Your child babbles some incoherent words and you hear the keys jingling, then the creak of the door. Running to the foyer, you’re excited about what Eren will cook for you. A kiss on his lips and he’s already wrapped around your fingers, bubbling desire in his heart to hold you instead of groceries. You ask Eren if he needs assistance but all he does is tell you to look after Armin. He knows the new things about Armin that you don’t. You began work this month and already your son has changed so fast. He can crawl and even tries to stand, he does not take those naps at noon when you stayed home before. You almost feel bad that Eren has to stay awake the whole time from seven in the morning till afternoon, when Armin finally takes a nap.

Lunch begins, you take a sip of water and marvel at his cooking. You usually cook on the weekends unless you visit your parents and his parents, but you already loved Eren’s dishes. They keep getting better with every subsequent try. Eren serves you some of this new dish he learned from an Italian neighbour. “It’s called pasta, I made it with egg yolks and flour. Before you get worried, I used the whites to make meringue.” he says, emphasizing his worry and fear in your disappointment for wasting egg whites. You smile at him and eat the pasta he made with shrimp and tomatoes, it even has a creamy sauce sticking to it and some parmesan sprinkled on top.   
“It is very good, you’ve improved.” your validation sparks a light in him.  
“Armin loved the sea… Sasha loved seafood.” Eren says out of nowhere, losing the glossy reflection on his eyes.  
“Sasha?” you ask.

“From my dreams, I think we were all friends.” he says, looking down at his plate. The questions of yours and the sound of cutlery on a porcelain plate, Armin’s whining and chewing all disappear. He hears about Sasha dying on an airship, Eren sees Armin’s disappointment in him. Who were they? What are they doing now? Do they even exist? Eren looks up, flabbergasted eyes meet yours. He calms down and silently eats the food he lovingly made for you. Eren couldn’t have been more grateful for the sheltered and free life he had with you. Afterwards, Eren serves what he calls a “meringue chantilly” and you ardently eat it, loving the strawberries and the little details. 

In the evening, you leave little Armin with Pieck. She has looked after him before and she often talks to Eren about their shared field of official work. Her husband Jean and Eren were rivals in school or so you’ve heard, but they have remained good friends since. Eren has planned on taking you to a restaurant for dinner, something you two don’t do often since Armin came along. You sit across from each other, waiting for the waiter to come by. One man does come by, with burnt red hair and challenging eyes.   
“Eren!” he excitedly says. “What are you doing here?”  
“I’m here to treat the missus.” he says, uninterested in engaging in conversation but he briefly introduces you to him.   
“Wow, what a beautiful wife. It’s very nice to meet you! I’m the manager here so if the two of you need anything, tell me.” Floch Forster says before calling a waiter to take your orders. Often winking at Eren from the cashier’s counter, Eren frowns and looks at the window. You notice this act and nudge his chin and direct him to look at you.

“I don’t like that boy, we were friends in high school and he would always kiss the teachers’ asses. Especially my brother’s and Mr. Smith’s.” He rambles. Erwin Smith and your brother in law, Zeke Jaeger, were colleagues of yours and they also taught in Eren’s school when he was a teenager. You enjoy hearing stories about them as often as you can.  
“Oh, did you ever get in trouble for Mr. Forster?” you playfully ask. He shakes his head horizontally, meaning no.

But this is very funny. Something about Connie, Ymir and even Jean Kirstein brought him to flashbacks from God knows what. He won’t say much to you because he doesn’t know much. Being around Floch reminded him of this familiarity; this fear that he can harm people although Floch has never actually harmed anyone. This fear that maybe Floch hurt people on Eren’s behalf. What is Eren even thinking of? Eren just wants to be with you, he doesn’t want to see fragments of the life of a cruel man. Eren gets bothered with everything that he sees without wanting to, he wants freedom from his own mind. He only receives this will of liberation when he is in your arms, you peppering him with kisses. The clock strikes at midnight, your baby has been bathed and fed before falling into the world of sleepiness. Your house has a nursery, a guest bedroom you use as a study and the master bedroom. Armin would only sleep at night in your room while you waited for Eren in your satin nightgown, one his mother gave you as an extra wedding present. 

Eren molds into your body, on top of you as you lie on the bed. Tears are spilling from his eyes, voice threatening to break. He mumbles about losing you, kissing your collarbones to express it more. During the day he is always calm and low-key, slightly touch-hungry but not as much as night. “I think I was a bad man in my dream.” he whimpered, not loud enough to wake Armin up. “Would you still take me in? Maybe that’s why my mom was taken from me. I don’t know if it was you or my mother but it felt so… bad.” All you could do is travel your fingers through his shoulder length hair, caressing his temples every so often.  
“I think it was a punishment, but I don’t know.” he says. “But you’ll be with me, right? You won’t be taken away?”   
“Of course, I’ll stay with you.” you whisper into his ear. “Do you trust me, baby?”   
“Yes, mommy. More than anything.” 

You clutch him to your chest until his tears stop dropping on your nightdress, his hand holds onto one of your breasts to calm himself down. Later on, he shifts to his side of the bed and you go to sleep hugging your pillow. Knowing that this world, this life, his wife and his children are all real. His mother is alive and he’s just trying to go through every day like the good son she raised him to be. So he can raise his own son, but also receive the motherly affection from his wife.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you guys for so many hits and kudos. i love you aall. i gotta say, the mommy kink may go overboard but i really wanted to humanize eren. i hope mikasa is a reader because it would be so sweet if eren had an AU like this!!


	4. Unethical

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A look into the past may answer unanswered questions. Eren fears himself and has been fearing others too.

Eren Jaeger was the loud boy in the neighbourhood, fighting off bullies but being beaten by them regardless. Never giving up. His purpose felt so different that he didn’t understand that something was missing. You see, Eren has been free. His hands have never been shackled, his legs were never chained. Nobody hurt him to the point of imprisonment, nobody saw him as a threat to society. Grisha, his father, has always been supportive of whatever Eren wanted to be. An ethics researcher, working for the government or the university teaching others. As a doctor, Grisha was assisted by Eren when he needed to teach the future’s surgeons what medical ethical protocols were. Paradis is just a democratic nation, too peaceful to ever be near war. Racism isn’t a factor, neither is oppression but yes, systematic sexism has always been around.

What Carla never understands is how Eren has changed dramatically since he was fifteen. His lips would twitch more in anger, than ever before, but never at people anymore. Only himself. Sometimes he would spend days without talking, smiling on rare occasions. Grisha’s first wife Dinah has never complained about her ex husband remarrying. She easily befriended Carla and even invited her to her second wedding. Dinah cares for Eren as much as she cares for Zeke. Although Zeke is slightly too strategic and is quick to act, he has shown love for his brother. That’s why when Eren suddenly flinched at the mention of his father’s first family, Carla knew something was wrong. Her son wouldn’t talk to her but often hugged her, slept on her lap and mentioned that he feels strange. Connie and Jean would still be around him and they couldn’t help but be happy when Eren met you while you were in town. 

Fresh faced and carrying yourself with stability, you didn’t fail to prove fellow nobility wrong. Usually, privileged girls such as you would be married off from one mansion to another and have children to repeat the steps. Despite your mother’s rich background, she made a name for herself when she sought education and proved her “noble” counterparts wrong. You wanted to follow her steps but not your grandmother’s. You married Eren right after you got your Master’s degree, having known each other for two years. He is already three years older than you and you assumed that maybe his hotheaded and impatient reputation was history, that he only has matured into the strong willed and calm man he is. Boys grow up, one day yours will too. 

Your wedding was grand to say the least; big cake, beautiful dress, your family’s Chateau never failed to impress but with the decorations, everyone marveled at the whole home. Eren and you got married in the backyard beside a lake, people sang and your family cried. Even the carriage looked like an ornament, driving you to a remote manor your uncle let you borrow for the honeymoon. That was the first time either of you saw each other fully bare, the first time Eren became one with a person. The best person that could ever be. You knew who you married, one who didn’t force you to alter your name. One who would do whatever you wished to. One you couldn’t recognize from the boy you heard about; who would constantly bicker and pick up fights with Jean over the smallest things. And Eren? He felt good for the very first time in years; his dreams finally breaking away little by little. The world he feared felt like background vocals in the opera; existing vigilantly but not with vibrance. 

Then came your baby, he would stay even more quiet. More and more affectionate; you didn’t understand whose hormones were more troubled. He would whine at himself and grit his teeth when he failed to bring you food you wanted at that exact moment, like the creme brulee at your wedding- you wanted it so badly in the middle of the night, the chef was out of Paradis and went to somewhere in France. How could Eren bring it? You even told him that it’s a wish you’ll forget, one that can’t be granted. Then came sex; he wanted to please you the moment you asked for it. Once he came to visit you in the middle of your work, but nimbly held you against the wall of your personal office and slowly thrusted in and out. He never initiated it, whatever you asked was yours. And you still failed to connect it to someone who was strongly willed to fixing patterns of poor behavior. Because instead of focussing on his passion, he focused on you. You never brushed it off, something was wrong. Then you gave birth.

While you were home, taking months off for your job, you spent a lot of time with baby Armin. Carla, Pieck and Historia came to visit you a lot to keep you company sometimes when Eren went off to work. One day Eren stepped in to see Armin playing with your loose ponytail, now moved to the side. He shrieked silently, making eye contact with the confused child and looked away while he greeted you. They started coming back and you were used to being with a needy creature already, now your once affectionate husband saw you with more love hungry eyes. 

It is 3 am now, Eren wakes up in cold sweat. His chest is heaving up and down, up and down and his eyes widen in surprise. Many more flashbacks, it’s as if he once lived a lie where he was the bane of monstrosity. He even realized that his protection towards you mirrored the protection that two people he might have known had. Suddenly, he thinks of Zeke visiting you often and laughing with you. What a random thought to have after a nightmare he’s starting to forget. Just the other day, his half brother invited Erwin, Levi Eren for dinner. Something felt so strangely positive, even with Levi’s dismissive demeanor towards Zeke. Something gave Eren the idea that it wasn’t always like this. But when and where?

Your body writhes beside him, eyes starting to flutter open. You looked at Eren’s disheveled form, torso sitting straight up and drinking from the glass of water on his bedside table. Eren was panting and you guessed it right, more images. He must have seen more, too detailed and specific images. He softens at the sight of you half-awake, leaning against the bedframe to give him comfort.  
“Zeke was… killing a lot of people.” Eren says. “Some I already knew.”  
“Why was he killing? Do you know?” you ask. Eren shakes his head, not knowing why.  
“Remember Floch? In these dreams, I remember him being this ass-kissing guy. Maybe I projected it into my vision but you know, I am aware it is not our reality. But he would do whatever I said. No matter how… unethical.”  
“So you were… a threat? Because if you dislike what Floch did, and he did whatever you asked, you must have been different.” you say, rubbing your eyes.  
“But you know I am good. I was good there too and now I am good and I make mistakes like everyone else and I could never do what… I did, I-”  
“I know you are good, you are more than the definition of wholesome.” you say. “Not that I believe in multiple lives, but if you were bad in one of them, you had a reason.”  
“But what I did was not justifiable!” your husband almost yells at himself and widens his eyes. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to yell at you, I’m… I’m upset at myself. Please, don’t be mad.”  
“Your friends said that you were very loud and I almost thought it was a myth.” You say softly, struck with surprise at this sudden volume. He begins to whimper, moving further from your side of the bed. You’ve seen him protest and rant, why is he suddenly afraid you’d abandon him? Thank God that Armin was sleeping in his nursery or he’d be crying. 

“Eren, look at me.” you command him. His teal eyes, glittering teardrops adorning the lower lashline, meet your mouth and they watch the words you utter.  
“I don’t know if you see me as a maternal figure or your wife, but I know it’s somewhere in the middle ever since I conceived.” you say. “I do care about what you have been seeing in your sleep or in sudden moments. So don’t be afraid of me.” With that, he whimpers on your shoulders and kisses your neck in a sudden.  
“I’m suddenly finding my resolve.” his broken words filter the mood. “Maybe I have to live with it, but whatever I have now is mine. And I should learn to live with it.” A kiss on your lips and he dozes off with the side of his head pressed on your tits and with two arms around your waist. Strong legs tangle with yours and you fall back to sleep too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for motivating me to continue this story. I am very proud of myself. Maybe I've gone less on the smut this time but I didn't want to neglect the reason why Eren has mommy issues.


	5. cold flame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who yearns for who in this marriage? 
> 
> PS- I really wanted to explain the lactation kink. It has nothing to do with exploiting breastfeeding children. It's actually quite common between couples and this has nothing to do with your relationship with your baby. Both are separate. I also wanted to humanize two people in a marriage, so the sexual content in here focuses not on them being objects.

Armin is so tiny, his skin is so soft. His cries are so high pitched but the soft noises of happiness are so warm. Eren loves his son for showing him what you mean to your husband. More than a wife, more than the mother of his child. He can’t describe it. Sometimes he wishes that the kid who lost his own mother in chaos could have you around, but he has you now. Your guardianship is what he must have longed for in another world. Your smell, your sound and even your voice are all addictive. One he would get terrible withdrawal from. While you’d hold Armin by your chest to feed him, purely on maternal instinct, Eren used to look annoyed.  
“Babies can’t have anything else but this for the first six months.” you would scold him.  
“But I want it too.” Eren would say. “We can look for substitutes for it, okay?”  
“Eren, you’re being childish.” you said more. “It’s a necessity for our son.”

Nobody knows you feed Eren, you don’t know why you do it. It’s completely normal when you feed your child, it’s how it should be. You’ve read in some books that some adults have nursing relationships, it can be both sexual and non-sexual. Husbands and wives did it, sometimes when there’s too much coming in and your child isn’t hungry. It’s originally meant to bond babies and mothers, your duty as one should be to make sure your baby is healthy and gets what he needs. Eren accepted your reasoning, knowing that he was indeed being childish and that he can’t neglect his son.

Your husband doing it feels completely different. Sex is a whole other story, you both would enjoy playing with your chest. You genuinely thought Eren likes it because he’s been playing with your tits since you both fell in love. Before marriage, you only stuck to lighter things in the bedroom whenever the chance was there and the opportunities were rare. To Eren Jaeger, it is much more discreet. He likes your milk to excite your senses but also to comfort himself. Once Zeke guessed the situation when the “boys” were getting drinks before Eren’s 27th birthday and he said that Eren is a momma’s boy who went from one mother to another. Your husband felt bad, it may have been a joke but he doesn’t like it when Zeke teases him in such ways. Anyone but a bearded man with a tattered monkey doll. Carla was his “mom”, you were his “wife” and these titles are poles apart. But Zeke isn’t wrong.

Eren’s uncommon attachment aside, he does realize that you have to care for Armin. That he is your number one priority. Substitutes are rare and expensive, those are needed for babies without mothers or women who can’t induce. His selfish, bratty desires almost taking over his baby’s need brought him guilt. The baby did nothing wrong, it is Eren’s wish to build a family early on. You sit on the sofa, Armin playing on the rug below you and stares up at you every now and then. Eren shakes his head, thinking his thoughts are intruding his chores. At least Armin has two loving parents, just as Eren did. But Eren also understands what it’s like to be orphaned and the extent of it he can visualize it is bizarre. 

Eren gets ready to meet Jean, Connie, Zeke and Levi for a drink at the nearby pub. He carefully wears the crisp black shirt and a vest he bought from the market the other day. He knows you like it when he dresses up, he craves for the look of enlightenment when he appears appropriately. You notice and give him a kiss on the cheek, assuring him that you would be fine and that he needs not to worry for the child. He never worried about Armin if he was around you, he never worried about anything that had to do with you.  
“I don’t like going. Not with Zeke, I heard Floch was coming.” he says, eyes turning cold.  
“What’s the worst they could do to you?” you ask, focusing on brushing Armin’s hair from his eyeline. Eren takes a look at his son and takes a gulp. His soul begs to tell you or anyone, just how much they could do, but he doesn’t even know what it is.  
“Jean really had to invite that idiot.” he mutters without answering your question, kisses your forehead and leaves.

Only two hours have passed and it is now 9 pm. You feed Armin the meal you prepared for him and he is a good baby who eats but he makes a mess too. You wonder how Eren does this every day, the older Armin gets, the harder it is to care for him. To make sure he doesn’t crawl into dangerous places or that he doesn’t hit his head. Armin is a human being, he’s beginning to learn and he observes very fast. He points at foreign objects but thankfully doesn’t have the habit of putting random things in his mouth. Once he trapped a mosquito between his palms and tore up from a little red bite. Your mother in law mentioned how often Eren threw tantrums and a part of you dreads Armin being eight or nine and rebelling against you. But you are just a parent and he is just a child. These matters are bound to correlate with certain points of your life. You’re young too and you’re wondering if you need to have another child in case Armin gets lonely. Let him grow and when you miss teaching someone how to “be” and “exist”, ask your husband’s opinion and mutually welcome another child.

Your front door unlocks from the outside and Eren makes his entrance, disheveled and panting. You notice his black eye and rush to his assistance and he steps away, telling you to not be near him. Oh no, you know what it is. It doesn’t happen often, a trait that Eren trademarked as a kid. His haughty determination led to sudden bursts of anger out of defense of something, anything. Who pissed him off today?

Eren goes straight to the bathroom, asks you not to disturb him while he bathes himself. He even mentions not wanting dinner because he’s full. Struck in worry, you slurp your soup and chew on your bread until he comes out. The house is almost silent, not even your baby is making a sound. You carry Armin from the high chair to his cot in the nursery, hoping that maybe Eren will need a chat before bed. You’re still in the clothes you have been wearing since your shower in the afternoon, your work tomorrow doesn’t excite you after such a peaceful weekend. More papers to grade, more talking to do and you despise wearing a scarf in a humid lecture hall. Your husband’s artwork on your neck from last week is healing though, maybe you can go without feeling hot.

Eren comes out of the bathroom, towel adorning from his hips and you run to him with the pack of ice you arranged. After treating the minor wound, he leaves to his bedroom on his own and expects you to follow. You’re confused by his whole demeanor but you place the ice on the kitchen counter, then climb up the stairs to where you expect him to be. Eren’s sitting against the headboard, eyes coldly staring at you. You know what to do. 

When his anger controls him and he is quick to act, which is rare now, he will shut himself out from the world. Except from you. But sometimes, Eren’s raging soul is suppressed from his body and he begs for an outlet. It makes you nervous, but your insides throb in need. He finally opens his mouth.

“Suck, no rewards for whores like you tonight.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for a boring chapter. i wanted to write smut but i wasn't in the mood for it.  
> thanks for 2K hits and so many kudos. i love reading the comments and it makes me happy that some of you like this story so much. also, i really wanted to capture a loving marriage. i really did, especially the sex. it might be too traditional but the setting of period is different.

**Author's Note:**

> I am a huge eremika shipper honestlyyyy so i didn't include mikasa or armin in this AU. LMK if you want a part 2. thanks for the love and support.


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